Just Sayin' Is All... #1

I’m still reeling over Fox News’ recent onslaught on the new Muppet movie.

Knowing that Fox News is a propaganda tool for the RW (‘tool’ invariably being the correct word usage when referring to anyone who is RW), I was taken aback by the fact that they weren’t standing up for their own.

Look at the current GOP presidential wannabes and – well, can you think anything but Muppets? They’re real people, you say? Don’t make me laugh.

Take one look at Michele Bachmann and tell me that’s not a sock wearing Dumber-Than-Thou lipstick and a pair of google eyes right out of Jim Henson’s spare parts bin. If she were a real person, she would have drowned years ago as a result of being too stupid to come in out of the rain.

After convincing his supporters that he was being victimized by the baseless unproven allegations of his various and sundry lady acquaintances, Herman “Herb” Cain conveniently dropped out of the race just as Miz Piggy announced her new tell-all book. Coincidence? Yeah, sure, whatevah.

Rick “Wannabe” Perry – an obvious reworking of the original George Dubya Muppet, only with more ego and less awareness of the world around him (yes, apparently that IS possible – who knew?).

Rick “Tickle Me Frothy” Santorum – insert your own joke here. The use of lubricant would be greatly appreciated.

“Newt” Gingrich – Newt is no newcomer when it comes to show biz, having starred as a boy centaur in The Mighty Hercules cartoon series back in the ‘sixties, followed by a stint as lead singer of Newtie & The Blowhards. The success or failure of his new career as a muppet remains to be seen.

As one of the Faux News bobbleheads stated: “This is a Muppet movie, for goodness sakes!” Yes, it is. And so was the last GOP debate, and the one before that, and the one before that. And goodness had nuthin’ to do with it.

Speaking of Muppets, ABC News announced that the Stephanopoulos (aka “George”) will be replacing Christiane Amanpour as host of the political talk show This Week. It seems that having an intelligent, knowledgeable and articulate host of a political show was deemed too wild an idea to catch on.

The good folks over to the Florida Family Association, a Tampa Bay group, has led a campaign urging companies like Lowe’s to pull their ads from the TV show American Muslim. Lowe’s promptly complied. I don’t know about you, but I’m reluctant to buy household fixtures from a company whose principles are that flimsy. Who wants a toilet that’s liable to collapse the minute a big, fat, ignorant, pseudo-Christian ass sits on it?

To their credit, the Association’s website provided a handy-dandy e-mail letter for its adherents to send to sponsors of the program – recognizing that most people who buy into this sort of bigoted crap can’t reed, spull, or rite gud Inglish. You just have to scratch your X at the bottom of the pre-fab screed, and away you go!

Senator John McCain had another “senior moment” this week while talking about Obama’s withdrawal of US troops from Iraq, stating:

“I believe that history will judge this president’s leadership with scorn and disdain, with the scorn and disdain that it deserves.”

Obviously McCain was talking about W’s presidency – but in the old geezer’s defense, he can’t be blamed for yet another demonstration of his encroaching senility. Most of us knew his mind was gone when he decided that Sarah “Quitterella” Palin had just the kind of stick-to-itiveness the nation needed in a VP.

On the topic of Quitteralla, it looks like some posters on Republican websites are convinced that she’ll be announcing her campaign kick-off any day now, leaving the other wannabes choking on her dust as she surges ahead in the polls. These are the same people who were convinced their Great White Hope, Fred Thompson, was going to be elected in 2008 in a landslide. Some of you might remember Fred’s stirring rallies on the campaign trail – you know, the ones he’s spent the last three years trying to forget.

Unfortunately, events in the latter part of the week bring us back to Newtie-Patootie, and this from a recent conference call with reporters:

“In order to restore balance between Congress, the White House, and the courts, Gingrich recommended ignoring rulings, impeaching judges, subpoenaing justices to have them explain their rulings and, as a last resort, abolishing the courts altogether.”

Apparently Newt thinks he’s running for All Fall On Your Knees Before My All-Powerful Dictatorship of the US, rather than the office of the presidency. My prediction: he hasn’t a chance of winning either race.

Help is on the WAY!!!! In an Sunday interview with Chris Wallace on FAUX-News, Mitt Romney discussed his tax plan, which would net middle class families a whopping $167 in tax savings.

“Well first of all, $167 is not zero,” said Romney.

Okay, with you so far, Mittens. It’s NOT zero – it’s pretty damned close, in the great scheme of things, but it’s not zero.

He went on to say:

“And number two, one of the reasons people don’t save their money is that they don’t see an incentive to do so. Look, I recognize it’s not a huge tax cut.”

Sharp as a tack, this one.

“It is a tax reduction that allows middle-income folks to participate in making a brighter future for themselves and saving.”

The mind boggles at how much brighter a future one can have with an extra $167 flowing into the bank account every year! With that kind of moolah, I’d be off to live in that palace in France – the one Mitt resided in during his life as a “poor missionary”.

Five Guys Named Schmoe:

“Five Georgia men have challenged President Barack Obama’s inclusion on next year’s presidential ballot, with at least some citing an oft-discredited theory that Obama is not eligible for office because the Constitution says that a president must be a “natural born citizen.”

To my recollection, no one challenged Bush being on the ballot in 2004 on the grounds of being a mentally deficient, inarticulate drunk with a propensity for embarrassing the entire nation every time he opened his mouth – despite the fact that after his first four years in office, there was absolutely no doubt about any of the aforementioned.

Perhaps we should have. When it comes to people being unfit to be POTUS, we had an airtight case.