Dear Republicans: REALLY?

Dear Republicans: REALLY????

Republican World just gets weirder and weirder every day. Don’t believe me? Take a trip down “Here’s The Truth of the Matter” Lane with me.

Republicans are currently slamming President Obama for mentioning Osama bin Laden and how he is – OMG, DEAD!

“How dare he!” whine the Republicans.

However, I didn’t hear any of them whining when Dubya landed on the aircraft carrier, watermelon stuffed into his flight suit, and declared (with a big banner and everything), “Mission Accomplished.”

So I’m wondering who is really “spiking the football” here. President Obama, who actually, truly, madly, deeply DID give the order to take out bin Laden? Or Dubya with his watermelon, flight suit, and pack full o’ lies? Another question: Do you think Willard could have done the same thing?

Right. That’s what I thought.

And then there’s the “War on Women.” According to John Boehner, aka St. Orange of Julius, in his latest pearl-clutching episode on the House floor, it is the Democrats who started, and are perpetuating, said war.

Really?

Which party, both on the federal level and the state level, has introduced eleventy-billion bills designed to quash the rights of women, particularly when it comes to reproductive and other health issues? Which party, and their minions (Rush, I’m talking to you!) has engaged in slut-shaming? Which party does the Governor who suggested that women just “close their eyes” if they didn’t want to see the on-screen results of their medically unnecessary transvaginal ultrasounds belong to? The Democratic Party?

BZZZZZ!!! I’m sorry, pasty white “R” man. It was your party, not the Democratic Party, that did that.

Wanna keep going? Okay. Here we go:

Here’s another one for you: Republican men (and their Stepford Wife surrogates) are going around saying that there is no wage disparity, but hey, if there really IS wage disparity between men and women, well, there is a perfectly logical reason for that. A couple of perfectly logical reasons actually:

Perfectly Logical Reason Number One: Men work more hours per week than women do on average. Okay, let’s say that’s true. However, where Perfectly Logical Reason Number One falls apart is that the true argument is not that men make more than women because some men work more hours than women. The actual Perfectly Logical Reason Number One reason is that when you look at per-hour wages, men make more per hour than women do for doing the same damned job! Got that, Republicans? Do you need me to go over that for you again?

See, let’s average this out. Let’s say Jane and John both work for the same company (or even different companies, if that’s your cup o’ tea), but they are doing the same damned job. But let’s say that Jane makes $15.00 an hour at her job and John makes $18.00 an hour for the same damned job. And let’s say that Jane and John both work, on average, 40 hours a week. What, pray tell, makes John more worthy of getting $3.00 more an hour than Jane does for doing the same damned job?

Can you explain this to me, without condescending, ugly smirks on your faces? Can you? Really?

No, I didn’t think so.

Perfectly Logical Reason Number Two is: Well, women often take time off when they have children. Now, I will grant you that that is indeed a truism. However, I am quite puzzled as to why you think it’s okay that women make less than men for the simple fact that we can bear children, and thus we deserve to get paid less for doing the same damned job than men do, yet when Hilary Rosen said that Ann Romney has never held a job, you once again get your tighty whities twisted into a knot and scream, “How DARE you Democrats slam the mothers of this country?!!??!”

Really?

You say that mothers are valuable, and guess what? I agree with you. I really do. Where we part ways, however, is that mothers (and women in general) are only valuable to you when they serve your purposes, not because they are in and of themselves actually valuable.

If a woman is white, and married to a rich white man, and she stays home to raise her kids (accompanied with a cadre of housekeepers, nannies, yard workers, cooks, etc.), that’s all cool beans. BUT, if a woman is not rich, and worse, if she is a minority woman, well, then according to you, she’d best get off her lazy Welfare Queen backside and get out there, get a job (or 3 or 4), pull herself up by her bootstraps, and get on with it. She’d better not DARE ask for any public assistance, because if she does, well, it just confirms to the Republicans that she is, in fact, a Welfare Queen and she is having babies on purpose for the sole reason that she wants to dip into the pockets of people like the Romneys, those poor rich souls.

And the biggest insult is that you sit on your velvet thrones, and you expect us to just bow at your feet and accept what you say as the gospel truth.

So I say again: REALLY?

Keep it up guys (and Stepford Wives).

We are not as dumb as you wish we were.

Just wait until November.