Fuck Huck

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To: Mike Huckabee (R-Douchebag)

To say that your recent remarks in response to the tragic events that unfolded at Sandy Hook are despicable would be a vast understatement. They were in fact beneath contempt – as are you.

“We ask why there is violence in our schools, but we have systematically removed God from our schools. Should we be so surprised that schools would become a place of carnage?”

First off, let’s be completely honest with each other, shall we? We both know you are a godless fuck who will say anything to appease the gun-toting voters who have traditionally supported your party.

Rather than risk losing that support by laying blame at the feet of those responsible, you instead choose to conjure up a vengeful God who allows the massacre of children out of sheer spite at not being prayed to in our classrooms, an arrogant God whose need to be worshipped and adored at every turn is so overwhelming, he smiles with glee as his revenge for being somehow marginalized is carried out by a gun-wielding, troubled young man – who was, given his years, not much more than a child himself.

In other words, you would sooner blame God – or the egomaniacal deity you are conveniently proffering as the Almighty – rather than admit to your own failures and those of your party members, who would sooner get down on their knees and felate every NRA member in the nation rather than lose their votes.

It isn’t God who allows assault weapons to be bought and sold, Huck; it’s people like you. It isn’t God who foments bigotry, hatred, intolerance and racism; it’s the idols of your party – like Limbaugh, Coulter and Beck. It isn’t God who loaded his weapons and took aim at a group of six- and seven-year-olds; it was a disturbed young man who never would have had access to such weapons were it not for the GOP’s desperate attempt to hold onto political power by supporting the NRA – and, along with it, every gun-nut who falls through the cracks of the flawed legislation your party seeks to uphold, the consequences be damned.

When President Obama was elected, the first outcry we heard from Republicans was, “He’ll take our guns away,” rather than, “He’ll take our Christianity away.” It was the number of weapons purchased since his taking office that went up – not the number of those attending church, nor the number of Bibles sold. So much for the priorities of the gun-toters whose “rights” your party consistently protects, while you hold them out as good, patriotic, Christian citizens who are merely interested in protecting themselves and their families.

“We’ve made it a place where we don’t want to talk about eternity, life, what responsibility means, accountability – that we’re not just going to have be accountable to the police if they catch us, but one day we stand before, you know, a holy God in judgment. If we don’t believe that, then we don’t fear that.”

As any true Christian can tell you, Huck, their determination to live a moral and ethical life is based on having embraced the teachings of The Nazarene, and not fear of eternal damnation. But then I doubt you are acquainted with any true Christians, so I can understand your not being familiar with the concept.

But the irony is not lost – the irony of hearing a Republican talking about responsibility and accountability, when your party accepts neither. It’s easier to blame a vengeful God of your own making – like that non-existent God who punished NOLA for its gay pride parades by causing Katrina’s devastation, the God who visits hurricanes and floods on innocent people due to their belief in equal rights for their fellow citizens regardless of sexual orientation – rather than accepting responsibility for legislation that allows weapons to be placed in the hands of those too twisted, too full of hatred, too mentally unbalanced to use them responsibly.

“Maybe we ought to let [God] in on the front end and we wouldn’t have to call him to show up when it’s all said and done at the back end.”

Yeah, I hear that noise, Huck – and I remember the perfect case in point. In 1998, one David Huckabee was dismissed from his job as a counselor at a Boy Scout camp after being involved in torturing a stray dog by hanging it from a tree limb and watching it slowly choke to death. One can only wonder what totally fucked-up home that boy was raised in – but apparently it was one in which God wasn’t “let in on the front end”. Maybe the kid’s father was just too damned busy being a hypocrite to notice.

I note that you lost no time back-pedaling from your initial comments on the Sandy Hook situation – which would be commendable were you concerned with being misquoted, misinterpreted or misunderstood. But the truth is your only concern was the political backlash, the absolute disgust your remarks gave rise to. And so you quickly jumped into damage-control mode – not out of any sense of regret, but simply because your party, or your own political ambitions, needed to be protected at all costs.

I also note that your pro-gun Republican colleagues refused invitations to stand their ground on the past weekend’s political shows, and the NRA has been silent since last week’s events. Here’s a clue, Huck: When you hold a position that you feel you can’t defend in the public arena, it’s because your position is indefensible.

All of the above being said, please feel free to go back to kissing the asses of the last group of voters the GOP can still count on for future support: the gun-nuts, the firearms-addicted, the addle-brained wusses who require an arsenal of semi-automatic weapons to protect their two-bedroom house and their high-def TV. And if a bunch of kindergarten kids and their dedicated caregivers wind up dead, well, that’s the price we all have to pay so that a bunch of right-wing idiots can have unlimited access to weapons whose only purpose is to kill.

In closing, let me point out to you that the God most of us believe in is not the least bit interested in the quantity of adoration He is given, but the quality of those who act in His name.

And they WILL act – you, your party, and your fake Christianity be damned.

Sent this day, December 17, 2012, in utter disgust,

— Nance Greggs